Failure: There are Worse Things to Fear

The fear of failure has been on my mind a lot recently since I decided to start a new business.  I haven't stopped my old business.  I just added something on, something I think could generate some additional passive income for me and my husband as we move towards retirement.

It is very daunting to start a new business at 57 years of age.  I try to tell myself many people have made their fortunes later in life.  Colonel Sanders started Kentucky Fried Chicken when he was 65, for instance.  Grandma Moses first art exhibition was held in a drugstore when she was 78 years old.

When I hear stories like that, I am very inspired.  I think to myself, "Gee, maybe I should wait until I'm 65!  Or even 78!"  Seriously.  I do think that.  Because starting a business at 57 is a lot of work, and I'm already tired.  Maybe by 65 I'll be rested up enough to really give it a go.

Honestly, though, I don't think I'm afraid of failure nearly as much as success.  Success could be even more daunting.  I could have more responsibilities and a super busy lifestyle, and a whole new set of problems.  How would I handle more money than I need?.  Do I want new, time consuming challenges to dominate my life?  Do I really need my life to be rich, rewarding and full of meaning?

Seriously, these crazy thoughts go through my head all the time.  My only comfort is knowing the future of my new business really doesn't matter..  What if I fail?  The opinion of only one person matters to me, and I know he doesn't care.  I know already what he would say to me. To paraphrase Matthew's gospel, "Don't lose your priceless soul for few lousy, extra bucks."

And if I succeed?

I recently read the story of a man who died.  Before he was resuscitated, he had a harrowing experience of being dragged into hell by beastly spirits.  Then, as a last ditch effort, this lifelong atheist called out to God.  Immediately, Jesus and his angels came.  They spoke for awhile, reviewing his life up until that moment.  Now, as it happened, this man was a very successful business man.  What amazed him was that neither Jesus nor the angels were impressed by his worldly acumen.  In fact, the only experience in his entire life that impressed them was a moment when he was a child of ten.  His sister was in her bedroom, crying.  He walked in, climbed on her bed, and wrapped his arms around her.  He stayed there until she calmed down.

 The rest of his accomplishments, apart from this, were so much chopped liver.

Pax et Bonum,
Rose