Christmas Day 2011 is waning. I spent most of Christmas Eve at church, a most satisfying way to spend Christmas Eve. I played with my son and another young woman as a trio at his church, a Unitarian Universalist Fellowship, I unfortunately had to run from there to my church so I could play violin at the 8 p.m. Mass, so I didn't have an opportunity to hang out at there and talk to people. Then I rang handbells before the 10 p.m. Mass.
Last week I read an entry in Joy In This Journey, an evangelical Christian blog by a young woman named Joy. The entry is called "When I Sing Those Songs, I Lie to God." She had an interesting take on hymn singing. She said she feels like she's lying to God when she sings many of the hymns, so she often chooses not to sing them, because it seems hypocritical if she is not living what the hymn says.
I have been thinking about that. I disagree, respectfully.
I find that singing hymns in church is no different than praying. Song is prayer. Even if I haven't made God the center of my life every minute, when I sing those words, I feel it, I mean it and I think God knows I mean it. I can't always live up to it. I am a sinner and an imperfect human being. But singing those words (or whatever words are in any hymn we sing) helps me renew my determination to do better. It commits me to trying. And to me, it carries more weight than simply saying the words.
I have never chosen NOT to sing a hymn because I felt I hadn't lived up to them. I choose to sing them because I WANT to live them.